Saturday, November 12, 10:30 PM. Brewer.

I used the word “terrified” yesterday. It was accurate. If anything it’s getting worse.

Part of the fear is that I’m now wondering what else I may have missed. If gas and propane aren’t as secure as I thought, what else could I have gotten wrong?

Am I overlooking something with the cows or horses—some medication I’m supposed to give them—that will cause them to get sick and die?

Are we forgetting something about our diet now that we live off of old groceries and only occasionally have fresh meat and vegetables? Could we get scurvy? Will we suffer iodine deficiency?

I’ve been assuming our water filter is sufficient. I test it every few days for pH, salinity, and germs. It seems like it’s okay. It doesn’t have fluorine like city water did, but is there anything else I’m overlooking?

I had concluded that if people found us they would probably be peaceful. Now I’m starting to question that. It’s an expensive assumption to be wrong about. And if gas becomes scarce, competition for gas could put us at war with our neighbors. Assuming there are neighbors.

I do still believe there are people out there. I feel it in my bones. Even as I second-guess all our assumptions I can’t quite bring myself to doubt that. I don’t believe God would do it to us. One of these days we will find a live channel on the ham radio, or a message at City Hall, or a sign painted on the street, and we will go there and find someone at last.

I hope they’re good people.